Warning: The actions that about to take place in the live performance you are about to experience are neither representative of, nor endorsed by Merced Yosemite Reality, Yosemite Property Management or Merced Yosemite Construction, it’s agents, employees, customers, vendors, tenants, or sizable legal team. Do not attempt to try these tactics at home sales. Not suitable content for children unless accompanied by a state license real estate agent. Before attempting any of the following techniques or strategies depicted here; such as fraud, embezzlement, bribery, theft, puffing, harassment, hostile work environment or any unethical general business practices be sure to consult your attorney, C.P.A., and a licensed real estate broker and/or agent. FOR THE COMPLETE DISCLAIMER AND ADDITIONAL WARNINGS CONTINUE BELOW:

If you are a licensed broker, agent or sales professional Merced Yosemite Realty in no way guarantees improved performance, increase in sales volume, perceived larger business size, business growth, firmer contracts, rise in productivity or organic search engine enhancement through the unethical practices you are about to witness.

Some side effects of witnessing this performance may include: hysteria, uncontrolled  laughter, shortness of breath, dry mouth, elevated stress levels and anxiety (if sympathetic to the characters), possible nose bleed and vertigo depending on your seat location.

Merced Yosemite Realty works directly with reputable title companies to assure clear transfer of title for all of their transactions. This standard professional practice would have avoided Mr. Levene’s last client transaction failure due to lack of notification to the Buyer’s spouse.

Merced Yosemite Realty maintains significant investment in its tools and technology. All contracts and salient documents to every transaction are immediately backed up in secured third party cloud. Should any break in, fire or flood occur copies of your documents are safely and securely held in the cloud.

Merced Yosemite Realty maintains great respect for local law enforcement authorities and its broker, agents or employees would never attempt to deceive, impede or obstruct a police investigation.

Merced Yosemite Realty its agents and employees do not condone any form or extortion or threat in the work place. Mr. Moss’s attempt to coerce (via extortion) his co worker Mr. Aaronow into committing burglary would have been grounds for immediate termination and notification to law enforcement and governing licensing authorities.

Merced Yosemite Realty and Yosemite Property Management are an Equal Housing Opportunity brokerage and operates in accordance with Federal Fair Housing Laws. Contrary to what is depicted in this performance Merced Yosemite Realty does NOT discriminate against any person due to race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status or national origin.

Merced Yosemite Realty does not have any form of policy or incentive system that would prohibit agents or employees from access to caffeinated beverages based on performance. Most of our agents and employees are well caffeinated at all times, this is a cost the brokerage covers in its entirety.

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